Featured Blog: YOUR BLOG HERE

by Quercus


THE NEBULUS QUALITY OF THE ACoN BLOGOSPHERE:

When I first started this blog, I really didn't intend for this to be a personal blog as such. And in all honesty, one of the biggest reasons for this was that I didn't want my NFOO to find me! I wanted to remain anonymous, to just be who I am but under a pseudonym, and help others to find a central hub that linked all the excellent ACoN blogs together. (It had taken me so long to find the blogs I currently follow!).


BURN OUT & THE ACoN BLOGGER:

I've also noticed that ACoN blogs have a finite life-span. Some of the blogs I first read were pretty well defunct by the time I came around to them (for example, "Narcissists Suck" - Anna Valerious still moderates comments and posts maybe once a year, maybe, but I definitely found it after its hey-day). While I still refer back to her blog (it really is one of my all-time favourites) as it continues to be a useful and thought-provoking resource for me, it's also really nice to read the still-active journeys of other ACoNs. And I find that the newer, fresher blogs are always the hardest to find!

It seems to me, as someone who is still 'in the woods' of her ACoN journey, that the average life-span of an ACoN blog is only a few short years. Then it gets retired - the ACoN has moved on, resolved their issues, and has other battles to fight and victories to celebrate in their lives! I really wanted to start the sort of blog or site that could be passed on to someone else, or at least one that I could continue to support but have other, newer writers give it life when my burn-out point is reached. The reason for this is simple - I know what it felt like to be alone in cyberspace, trying to find a 'community' of people with problems like mine to interact with! It was very lonely for me at first, and I always had this sense that I was two years behind (or more!) on all the blogs I commented on. I felt that I had missed the boat, and I don't want any other ACoN in that fragile "first-step" phase to feel the way I did.


'WHAT NARC?' WE COULD DO THIS MAGAZINE-STYLE:

I also thought I'd have various other authors and bloggers contributing articles, so we could essentially run a little 'magazine' of sorts that highlighted the brave contributions of the sort of people who really put themselves out there to share, and to refer back to their personal blogs (if desired) so that all the ACoNs out there looking for answers/understanding could read more from the ACoNs who most interested them.

But it turns out that my idea didn't work all that well: comment forms seem to be sufficient for people to "have their say"; forums exist for anonymous posting as well; the sort of people who want to say more generally have their own blogs anyway and don't have time to do extra posts; and I'm the only contributing author on The ACoN Society to date (apart from Ruth and Sister Renee Pittelli who wrote a tonne for "FAQ", which I am very grateful for!). I'm really not a 'business-minded' person, as you can tell - my idea was half-baked at best! Good thing this is all free!

I do, however, want to try to come back to my original premise a bit and use this blog as I intended it to be in the first place - a launch pad!

I am formally inviting any blogger who follows/occasionally looks at my blog to 'pitch' their own blog here!

I have a link of recommended blogs on the right of my page (PLEASE let me know if you'd like yours added! Would be happy to oblige!), but it's not very visible, and every blog typically has a links list....

Instead, I was thinking it would be cool to have a "Featured Blog" post now and then, showing a screenshot of the blog and a blurb from the author as to what their blog is about, where/when it started, where it's going, and maybe a general synopsis of the author. For example, Quercus is a ACoN of an NM and (N)EF who is currently waffling on the LOW/NO CONTACT threshold, is over a year into therapy, and is married and in her thirties. Now if you were an only child of an elderly NF who lives with him still and is also his caretaker, we not might have much in common.

What I'd like to do is help facilitate ACoNs to find the blogs most relevant or useful to them! It took me forever to find my favourites (which are typically those whose stories are like mine, but not always! Sometimes a different perspective is also really helpful and educational for me!), and I wished that there had been a central site that really linked all the blogs together so that people could quickly find what they needed!

So it's still my hope that I can 'give back' to the community that has helped me so much by connecting ACoNs with the blogs of other ACoNs.

My readership is low compared to many of your blogs, so I'm not really powered to unite the whole of the ACoN world by any means! But if you see the potential here in what I'd like to do, please help me to do it!

If you would like to submit a "Here's My Blog - Here's What I Write About - Please Come Read!" article, I would happily post it and a link (and a permalink if I don't already have one in the link list). And if you'd like to post on your blog, "Hey, I just featured my blog on The ACoN Society" and linked back here, maybe your readers could find other blogs as well and we can get everyone connected to helpful resources and kindred ACoN spirits!

Alternatively, I can 'play journalist' and do a 'review' of your blog myself, along those same lines (obviously running it past you for approval prior to posting). 

If you're interested, please drop me a line! I can't say that your article will bring in x number of viewers (again, my readership might even be smaller than yours!), but I'd love to help people find the blogs that might resonate with them best. It took me a frustratingly long time to find blogs that really spoke to me and my situation, and I would love to shorten that interval for others.

If there's a blog that I haven't listed that you read and think that other ACoNs should be made aware of, please let me know (comment/email)! I can contact the author and see if they'd be interested in a link to their blog on The ACoN Society.


UPDATE - I've done a mock "Featured Blog" example on the "Submissions to The ACoN Society" page (at top right of page). If you scroll down the "Submissions" page, you'll see a blurb I did about this blog. That's sort of the idea/content I was envisioning, but have at 'er if you've got a different vision for what a "Featured Blog" post for your blog should be!